Still Standing
Lead, Nitrogen, Promethium, Berkelium, Magnesium, Ytterbium, Strontium, Tungsten, Rhodium, Hafnium, Yttrium, Praseodymium, Einsteinium, Silver, Mendelevium, Protactinium, Palladium, Molybdenum, Thallium, Actinium, Manganese, Cesium, Potassium, Uranium, Niobium, Cadmium, Copper, Carbon, Iridium
Dead
They were all toasted!
Iridium: OSMIUM! OSMIUM! I, I miss you so.
Helsinki: HELLO, IRIDIUM!? We're in Russia right now!
Note: 3 days passed since the last episode. Mendeleev did not kill anyone.
Location: Russia
Helsinki: We're near it. We're in the Serbian Plateau.
Stockholm: Siberian Plateau. What makes us think we're in Europe?
Rhodium: IRIDIUM'S DEATH, OF COURSE.
Iridium: I'M NOT DEAD!
Yttrium: Iridium... look. It's a cave.
Molybdenum: niobium's more useful than THAT!
Niobium: Thank you, Molybdenum.
Molybdenum shoves Niobium into the cave.
Silver: Come on, come in. I know you'll like it.
Palladium: Silver...
Silver: Palladium...
Cobalt ♀: What if...
Suddenly, they were all forced into a cave. After hours of walking...
!!!Manganese: GALLIUM'S DEAD!
Suddenly, Silver was not seen.
Stockholm: M-MANGANESE! Silver's gone!
Iridium: Silver's gone!? NO!
Manganese: OH NO! We have to strip guards to get into the next part!
A musical starts.
Molybdenum: It's creepy how they stand there, and don't even blink! I don't wanna see his bum, all naked and pink!
Carbon: Hey buddy, Can we bribe you, to strip yourself down?
Molybdenum: Yum yum happy go time fish?
Carbon: DON'T KILL HIM YOU CLOWN!
Niobium: No way, I can't strip him, Tantalum will freak!
German Niobe: And I'm allergic to uniforms.
Helsinki: Okay, that's just weak.
Osmium ♀: I made a vow that Iridium's the only man for me!
Helsinki: Okay, so then I have to do it? Hello!? Injury!? Ouch!
Niobium: If we're gonna find that clue...
German Niobe: There's only one thing to do!
Osmium ♀: Force someone to strip him down!
Everyone: And, sorry, Helsinki, that's you!
Helsinki: Ouch! Oh, wait!
Carbon: If we're gonna find that clue...
Molybdenum: There's only one thing to do!
Carbon: Force someone to strip him down!
Molybdenum and Carbon: And Stockholm, dude, that's you!
Helsinki: Osmium ♀! Look! It's Iridium! And I think he wants to strip!
Osmium ♀: Poor honey! Quick, get out of those things. And that will help, I bet.
Helsinki: Yeah, we're gonna find that clue.
German Niobe: We're doing what Mendeleev proposed!
Niobium: Force someone to strip him down!
Everyone: 'Cause if we don't, we're hosed!
Niobium: Totally ho-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-hosed!
The musical ends.
Osmium ♀: IRIDIUM'S FACE... PLANTED ON A GUARD!? GROSS!
Iridium: Helsinki! THAT'S NOT FUNNY!
Silver was shown, smashed by a rock, in the cave.
Palladium: Silver! NO!
Silver didn't speak.
Palladium: SILVER'S DEAD!
Osmium ♀: iridium's face planted on a guard is not funny!
Iridium: It was really weird.
Palladium: Silver's not speaking!
A few hours later...
Osmium ♀: It's 8:30 AM. Ooh, look here! It's the entrance to Japan!
Helsinki: YES!
Stockholm: Goth Burg!
Helsinki: Stockholm!!!
Holmium ♀: Helium!
Helium ♀: Argon's in agony!!!
Location: Japan
Helium ♀: OH argon! The thing is in Tokyo though!
Helsinki: Well...
Helsinki points at a subway.
Iridium: Helsinki... No adventure? Okay.
They all go into the subway. 30 minutes later...
Iridium: We're almost here!
Stockholm: Goth Burg is here!
Niobium: WHAT!?
Suddenly, the lights go out in the subway.
Iridium: WHAT!?
Suddenly, the subway crashes! The first to come out of the subway was Helsinki.
Helsinki: I am so fazed...
Iridium: osmium's!
Osmium ♀: iridium's face on a guard... made out of cardboard...
Iridium: YOU'RE ATTRACTED TO ME!?
Everyone comes out.
Helsinki: Where the hell are we?
Oxygen ♀: I don't know! There are no phone owners around here!
Carbon: Tin?
Tin ♀: ANTIMONY'S BACK!
Iridium: My name is Iridium...
Tin ♀: Iridium...
Iridium: My name is Iridium Radium Iridium.
Tin ♀: Yes. Creative.
Helsinki: We're in...
A neon's light sign says "Welcome to Tokyo!"
Location: Tokyo
Helsinki: We're in Tokyo!?
Stockholm: Helsinki!
Helsinki: We're finally here!
Oxygen ♀: Nitrogen's so fun to play with.
Nitrogen: Oh, Oxygen!
Oxygen ♀: Now, where is the portal?
Molybdenum: Mendeleev said that it was in a Japanese Restaurant.
Oxygen ♀: Molybdenum's a HUGE success!
Nitrogen: Just tell me... Which one?
Oxygen ♀: Oh, Nitrogen...
Chlorine ♀: iodine's fun to play with!
Nitrogen: Chlorine, THAT'S GONNA BE MINE!
Nitrogen grabs the jar of iodine from Chlorine's hands.
Chlorine ♀: OH BROMINE'S!!!!
Nitrogen: It's dangerous!
Nitrogen crushes the jar of iodine. However, the iodine points a certain direction!
Chlorine ♀: iodine's pointing a certain direction!
Iodine ♂: Which Iodine?
Chlorine ♀: THE LIQUID, NOT YOU!
Iodine ♂: I was never pointing a certain direction.
Everyone follows the iodine, and soon enough...
Strontium: I see the portal!
Iodine ♂: Is that it?
Strontium: Yes! Sorry, Iodine, we have to go now...
Nitrogen ♂: Nice time meeting you, Nitrogen.
Nitrogen: You too!
Everyone leaves (except for the gender-bent people) the gender-bent universe.
In the other universe...
Location: In front of the Dmitri Hotel
Stockholm: I'm a world explorer. I am...
Molybdenum: NIOBIUM'S PICTURE IN THAT SUPER WEIRD BOOK!?
Stockholm: Yes.
Persephone: I was looking for Praseodymium, so we all followed. Yes, even the Irish ones.
Helsinki: Well, we have to go!
Strontium: Wait... how did you get into the universe?
Helsinki: WE JUST WANTED TO!
Stockholm, Helsinki, Persephone, Niobe, Tantalus, Hades, and everyone else except for the original 28 Periodic Table Elements leave.
Praseodymium: It was just so sad.
Palladium: Platinum is still gone...
Cesium: Yes. Now, let yourself look at this picture. It will contain spoilers of a certain series. Like, really. If you don't want to see Randomized Elements Action spoilers, I suggest you skip this part.
4 of the 13 teams of Randomized Elements Action!
Palladium: Fun to look at. Man, where is my team?
Yttrium: Well...
"MANGANESE! YOU'RE BACK!"
Manganese: VANADIUM!?
Vanadium: MANGANESE'S ALIVE!!!
Vanadium and Manganese shared a really long hug.
Yttrium: Vanadium's alive again...
Ytterbium: NOT ERBIUM!? Erbium's our favorite!
Vanadium: Oh, Manganese!
Ytterbium: Erbium's my favorite. Who is your favorite?
Praseodymium: Definitely Magnesium.
Magnesium: manganese's!
Vanadium: I'M BACK!
Actinium: I wanted Radium to come back.
Meanwhile, they were watching "Changing Guard Mix."
Vanadium: That's so funny. Helium Argon's allergic to uniforms!
Tungsten: Tellurium!
Vanadium: Tellurium isn't me!
Tungsten: VANADIUM!
Vanadium: T-TUNGSTEN!!!
Suddenly, a rock smashes Polonium! Wait a second, Hydrogen! Isn't Polonium already dead? Cross that out.
Vanadium: T-TUNGSTEN!!!
Magnesium: Chlorine's long gone, but at least we have Vanadium now.
Vanadium: T-TUNGSTEN! YOU'RE BACK!
Tungsten: Tellurium!
Vanadium: tellurium's dead. get over it.
Magnesium: TUNGSTEN!? WHAT DID YOU SAY!?
Vanadium: TELLURIUM'S DEAD!
Tungsten: Where is Tellurium, anyways?
A pile of ashes that used to be Tellurium was shown.
Vanadium: TELLURIUM'S that.
Einsteinium: Thanks to my genius, Vanadium's back!
Vanadium: Can you bring back Tellurium?
Einsteinium: Sadly, I'm not that smart. She's gone...
Einsteinium stared at the pile of ashes known as "Tellurium."
Vanadium: Where are we?
Einsteinium: The First Floor Area.
Location: First Floor Area
Vanadium: tellurium's now just a pile of ashes...
Einsteinium: Sadly, Tellurium's now a pile of ashes.
Cadmium: Tellurium... WHY!?
Vanadium: Where did you get that pile of ashes?
Einsteinium: I snuck into the room... and found... a pile of ashes. Remember that bomb? YOU landed in the mud and eventually YOU went to Germany and then YOU met your gender-bent versions, Helsinki, Stockholm, Goth burg, and Niobe. Tellurium wasn't blown up... she was decimated into a pile of ashes.
Vanadium: tellurium's never gonna be forgotten...
Nitrogen: HYDROGEN'S DEAD! Now, it's just me!
Carbon: HOW ABOUT ME!?
Nitrogen: CARBON'S NONEXISTENT RIGHT NOW!
Nitrogen shoves Carbon into a pile of pig manure.
Niobium: (laughs)
Molybdenum: How about YOU experience it! No one hurts Carbon!
Cadmium: YOU...
Nitrogen: CARBON'S SMELLY!!!
Carbon: All thanks to you.
Vanadium: GROSS! What smells like the outhouse?
Nitrogen: Carbon does.
Carbon: Nitrogen did it all.
Molybdenum: FEEL THE POWERS.
Molybdenum grabs Niobium and then throws her into the pile of pig poop.
Molybdenum: NOW, FEEL YOURSELF SMELL BAD!
Niobium: THAT IS NOT FUNNY!
Suddenly... Cadmium starts to sing.
Cadmium: I miss the way, Tellurium said hello! By hoofing me, in the kiwis! I miss the daytime, when Tellurium moved to slow! Cause other times, she'd get freaky. Oh, Tellurium! Oh, Tellurium! I miss you so. Oh my Tellurium, my little Tellurium, why did I ever let you go? I miss her smile and they way she liked to bite! On my arm, when there was trouble. I miss the way she'd always say goodnight, and boot me in the kiwis, double. Oh Tellurium! Oh Tellurium! I, miss you so! Oh my Tellurium, my little Tellurium... Why did I ever let you go... Why did I ever let you go?
Niobium: I HEARD THAT TUNE A LOT OF TIMES... especially that song about Tantalum...
Cadmium: tantalum's still dead.
Niobium: Oh, Tantalum... I miss you...
Nitrogen: I'm the only one here... there isn't a CARBON'S based form that's like me...
Carbon: YOU SAID IT!
Nitrogen: Shut up, Cobalt.
Carbon: Cobalt's not my name. It's Carbon.
Nitrogen: Oh, Carbon. WHY DID I EVER WANT TO TAKE YOU WITH ME!?
Nitrogen gets a bunch of beer, and drinks it.
Nitrogen: oh yes. there's hydrogen helium lithium beryllium, boron carbons nitrogen oxygen fluorine...
Carbon: Nitrogen's drunk!
Nitrogen: Oxygen's is me!
Carbon: You're not Oxygen. Or else, you'd be a freaky Christian.
Nitrogen: But I'm Christian. You see, that thing called the Big Bang? Atheists believe in that theory. I'm Christian and Atheist at the same time.
Carbon: How?
Nitrogen: I DRANK BEER!
Nitrogen was moving, absentmindedly.
Nitrogen: oxygen's back!
Niobium: Either you stop acting like actinium's or we'll do something!
Actinium: HEY!
Nitrogen: thorium's radioactive, thorium's radioactive...
Actinium: NO IT ISN'T!
Nitrogen: stick staff!
Nitrogen gets out a stick and uses it as a staff. Carbon knocks Nitrogen out. Hours later, at 6:00 PM...
Magnesium: Nitrogen, are you okay!?
Nitrogen: oxygen's? what is an oxygen's?
Magnesium: I said Nitrogen.
Nitrogen: that's me.
Magnesium: Nitrogen's still drunk.
Nitrogen: YES I AM.
Manganese: When will the effects run out?
Magnesium: I don't know, Manganese... Maybe in a few hours.
Carbon: NO! I don't want a drunk idiot for the next few hours!
Iridium: She'll probably try to see Rhodium's ytterbium!
Rhodium: NO ONE LOOKS AT MY PRIVATE AREA!
Nitrogen: ytterbium's... they're interesting... just like oxygen's in water! just like oxygen's in water.
Thallium: We're running out of ideas. Let's go to the bedroom.
Location: The Dmitri Bedroom on the Second Floor.
Thallium: How about you try bringing back the dead ones? Cobalt and Lanthanum's gone forever. They're STILL trapped in the alternate universe.
Rhodium: Thallium's wise.
Thallium: This beer has ingredients. It has...
Ytterbium: BERYLLIUM AND ERBIUM'S IN THAT BEER BOTTLE!
Thallium: That's just fiction. It's really made out of...
Ytterbium: YTTRIUM'S MOTHER with a little hint of Hallucinating Tyler.
Thallium: No, Ytterbium. It's much more complicated than "Yttrium's mother with a little hint of Hallucinating Tyler."
Carbon: Nitrogen's still drunk. What do we do?
Thallium: I don't know... use her as a chair?
Carbon: Okay...
Carbon SITS on Nitrogen!
Nitrogen: oxygen's heaven? is that you?
Carbon: No. I'm using you as a chair.
Cadmium: I'LL GET DRUNK!
Cadmium gets out a beer bottle.
Thallium: C-CADMIUM!
Cadmium gulps down the beer bottle. Cadmium soon feels the same effects as Cadmium.
Carbon: Nitrogen's nothing but now a FUN CHAIR TO SIT ON! Except Cadmium's drunk... LET'S GET DRUNK!
Everyone gets drunk, except for Thallium.
Location: The Kitchen
Thallium: A typical day...
Ytterbium: COME ON REALLY TALL HALLUCINATION!
Thallium: Excuse me, but you're all drink.
Ytterbium: I love seeing Hallucinating Tyler!
Yttrium: Let's watch movies!
Episode 1 - Hallucinating Tyler's adventure of a life time!
Yttrium: WHAT IS THAT!?
Total Drama - LAGGED Island.
Yttrium: Totally normal!
Thallium: Come on, be serious.
Hallucinating Tyler sees Bridget and Jeff KISS!
Yttrium: YTTERBIUM'S! THAT'S AWESOME!
Magnesium: Now let's see the next episode!
Yttrium: What is it called?
Niobium: molybdenum's in the house tonight!
Molybdenum: It's called Duncan and Gwen!
Niobium: Oh, YES!
Hallucinating Tyler sees Duncan and Gwen KISS!
Hallucinating Tyler: (screams)
Niobium: VERY HILARIOUS...
Molybdenum: NOW LET'S WATCH... POLONIUM RADON!
Thallium: I wouldn't do that if I were you...
Molybdenum: just kidding. we're not watching oh my nitrogen either!
Thallium: Okay, stop being drunk. I'm the only one that's sane around here!
Palladium: Episode 3!
Hallucinating Tyler sees Bridget and Jeff having...
Palladium: OH! GIVE HER A...
Thallium: Excuse me, but I'm not a naughty person like you. Now, since you all are drunk... you can all be my little children now!
Palladium: Platinum's alive again!?
Thallium: NO! I mean, this!
Thallium: Now, follow the little Hallucinating Tyler!
They all follow the Hallucinating Tyler.
Thallium: Great! Now, be sane again.
Palladium: OH! Let's watch the finale of Total Drama - Lagged Island!
Palladium sees all the Total Drama World Tour couples having...
Palladium: WHOA! That is so freaky! And also, the Hallucinating Tyler freaks out.
Palladium: Oh, platinum!
Iridium: What!?
Cadmium: Please do make them!
Nitrogen: Okay...
Nitrogen oxygen's the whole thing.
Nitrogen: OXYGEN'S IN WATER - GOOD GOOD IDEA. ALSO SMELLS LIKE PIZZAS.
Palladium: Nitrogen...
Thallium: Okay, why are all of you acting like little actinium's?
Vanadium: Because we can! YES!
Thallium: However...
Thallium punches mendelevium's eyes.
Mendelevium: cadmium's in atheist town!
Thallium: How about, you can go sane after this.
Thallium sprays everyone with sleeping gas.
Thallium: Little idiots...
Ytterbium: Flutes! I play flutes!
Vanadium: oh manganese!
Manganese: vanadium's in the house tonight!
Thallium: Lead, stop being drunk!
Lead: OH, MY LITTLE OXYGEN'S!
Nitrogen: oxygen's my mother!
Carbon: nitrogen's great!
Nitrogen: carbon's dead!
Carbon: palladium's alive!
Palladium: i never knew... i am made out of erbium's!
Ytterbium: me too!
Palladium: look! rainbows!
Everyone follows the rainbow.
Palladium: LOOK! I SEE COBALT'S BLUE!
Copper: FOLLOW THE RAINBOW!
Thallium: Okay... There isn't even such thing as "Cobalt's blue."
Copper: I hacked Google!
Ytterbium: yttrium's on the way!
Copper: I know, right?
Lead: thallium's not fun...
Thallium: Please stop acting insane.
Lead: carbon's in your tummy!
Thallium: Bismuth's for no one's tummy.
Lead: THULIUM LEAD BISMUTH!
Thallium: Lead is crazy enough.
Thallium hits Lead with a rock.
Lead: THALLIUM'S I GOT AMNESIA!
Lead dances like the robots. Soon, does everyone else.
Copper: copper zinc thallium's germanium arsenic!
At 7:59 PM...
Protactinium: Hello. I'm apparently also sane here, since I wasn't here when the beer incident happened.
Copper: PROMETHIUM'S PROMETHIUM!
Copper shoots Protactinium with a wine bottle.
Actinium: thorium's so so SO radioactive, i think- OH NO! PROTACTINIUM!
Copper: I GOT A BULLS EYE!
Thallium: Protactinium... I think I'm the only one that cares about Protactinium...
Protactinium: T-Thallium...
Thallium: P-PROTACTINIUM! Stay strong... don't die yet!
Actinium: THORIUM'S (sadly) STILL RADIOACTIVE! HOW DO YOU STOP IT!?
Protactinium: Thorium was never radioactive. You're talking about...
Protactinium passes away.
Iridium: Palladium; SILVERS cadmium...
Cadmium: SILVERS DEAD!
Palladium: silvers, Cadmium! SILVERS!
Cadmium points at a silver's trophy.
Palladium: silvers, Cadmium!
Cadmium: palladium's a genius!
Palladium: were still alive.
Cadmium: protactinium's just sleeping!
Thallium: Protactinium's dead.
Actinium: thorium's sleeping too, that means!
Thallium: Actinium! Thorium is dead.
Actinium: thorium's dead? no!
Nitrogen: boron carbon, NITROGEN'S SO DRUNK...
Nitrogen collapses.
Nitrogen: carbon's life form...
Thallium: Carbon's Life form? Wow, I must be the only sane on here.
Lead: thallium's thulium.
Thallium: Come on. At least I don't put ytterbium's in your water!
Ytterbium: WAIT, WHAT!?
Lead: I put ytterbium's in people's waters.
Strontium: rubidium's ghost is here!
Yttrium: rubidium's smart!
Strontium: rubidium's my boyfriend.
Yttrium: STRONTIUM'S WALK!
Lead: STRONTIUM'S UGLY!
Strontium: yttrium's whale!
Ytterbium: YTTRIUM'S WHALE!? YUMMY!
Strontium: rubidium's back!
Thallium: Oh, fine...
Thallium had no choice but to...
Thallium: If I have to join you...
Thallium gulps down the beer.
Strontium: thallium's being smart!?
Thallium: yes, i am!
Strontium: Then...
Thallium: ...leads bismuth to your tummy!
Vanadium: thank god!
Mendeleev: Wow... They became easy targets. KILL THEM ALL!
Strontium: Mendeleev is here!
Strontium strontium's off.
Yttrium: let me do that!
Yttrium strontium's off.
Ytterbium: me too!
Ytterbium strontium's off.
Thallium: me too!
Thallium strontium's off.
Vanadium: also me!
Vanadium strontium's off. Basically, everyone strontium's off.
Strontium: GAY MUSIC!
Thallium: in honor of lead bismuth's, let's hold a beer party!
Actinium: thorium's no longer radioactive!
They stay up all night, acting like drunk people... but they were drunk. Then...
Actinium: oh...
Copper: nickel's sadly dead. he would have been fun to be drunk with.
Vanadium: and tin's (really?) more fun. i can imagine both nickel and tin getting drunk!
A drunk musical starts.
Rhodium: They're way ahead, so we've got to go!
Niobium: We've got to build something to sail, something we can row!
Nitrogen: It doesn't have to be a boat!
Rhodium and Nitrogen: As long as it stays afloat!
Rhodium, Niobium, and Nitrogen: Oh, why did we build Gwen's face?
Actinium and Uranium: It's almost ready, to set sail!
Uranium: Just hammering in the final nail!
Rhodium, Niobium, and Nitrogen: Oh, oh oh!
Molybdenum: We really did this fast!
Actinium and Uranium: Soon we'll be back in first class!
Actinium, Uranium, and Molybdenum: Because they built Gwen's face!
Rhodium, Niobium and Nitrogen: We built Gwen's face!
Actinium, Uranium, and Molybdenum: We're gonna take first place!
Rhodium, Niobium and Nitrogen: Because we built Gwen's face!
Rhodium and Niobium: We built Gwen's face!
Nitrogen does something annoying at the end. The musical ends.
Vanadium: let's go to sleep...
Niobium: molybdenum's face?
Iridium: osmium's (♀) was hilarious.
Nitrogen: nothing better than a really drunk beer party in the kitchen all night...
A while ago...
Helsinki: Osmium ♀; IRIDIUM'S HERE! And I think he wants to strip.
Right now...
Iridium: Helsinki...
Carbon: Because they built Gwen's face!
Nitrogen: carbon's based!
Carbon: nitrogen's!
Hafnium: i was stabbed in the heart. now i am alive as ever!
Carbon: so drunk...
Everyone falls asleep...when they are drunk.
To be continued...
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