Still Standing
Lead, Nitrogen, Promethium, Berkelium, Magnesium, Ytterbium, Strontium, Tungsten, Rhodium, Hafnium, Yttrium, Praseodymium, Einsteinium, Mendelevium, Palladium, Molybdenum, Thallium, Actinium, Manganese, Cesium, Vanadium, Potassium, Uranium, Niobium, Cadmium, Copper, Carbon, Iridium
Dead
They were all toasted!
Location: Kitchen
The elements saw what they did yesterday when they were drunk.
Yttrium: What were we doing yesterday?
Thallium: YOU GUYS WERE WATCHING ENDLESS EPISODES OF "Hallucinating Tyler!" I got drunk too because you couldn't stop it.
Palladium: Why did you drink that beer bottle in the first place, Nitrogen?
Nitrogen: CARBON'S NONEXISTENT, THAT'S ALL!
Carbon: Nitrogen lost her dear Hydrogen n' Oxygen. She doesn't think I exist.
Nitrogen: Carbon? Are YOU talking?
Vanadium: Tungsten's back...
Tungsten: Tellurium...
Molybdenum: TELLURIUM'S A GIRL THOUGH!
Vanadium: Tellurium's long gone, but I have YOU!
Einsteinium: Tellurium's ashes..
Molybdenum: tellurium's ashes... make me cry. it used to be a beautiful girl...
Vanadium: Tellurium's gone! i can't believe.
Niobium: Tellurium...
Tungsten: TUNGSTEN'S MORE ASIAN!
Thallium: it might be able to contain a little of "Tellurium" in it...
Einsteinium: Does it have any of Tellurium's DNA in it?
Thallium: TELLURIUM'S DNA!?
Einsteinium: Oh, NO! There isn't! However...
Einsteinium had a bag of some of every one's DNA.
Copper: Nickel's DNA!?
Einsteinium: Yes.
Tungsten: Yes! Everyone's back!
Cadmium: WHY Tellurium though? Why not our strategist, Iodine? Why not Tin? Why not Nickel?
Copper: Nickel's fun to have around you.
Potassium: Anyways, Thallium was still wise.
Niobium: I WANNA BE DRUNK!
Niobium drinks the beer.
Molybdenum: Niobium's going through drunk world again.
Molybdenum gets out some stocks and puts Niobium in them.
Niobium: tantalum's not on a electronic device.
Molybdenum: Anyone who gets drunk WILL be required to be in these stocks.
Niobium: yes, useless.
Nitrogen: CARBON'S NONEXISTENT. If I get drunk after drinking beer, carbon's fake.
Nitrogen drinks more beer than ever.
Carbon: Oh, great.
Molybdenum: Nitrogen! Get into those stocks!
Nitrogen: carbon's you!
Cesium: BARIUM'S 56, AND THIS IS WHERE OWLS ARE FAKE.
Palladium: I WANT BEER!
Soon, after Palladium drinks beer, Magnesium, Rhodium, Cadmium, Manganese, and Iridium drink the beer. They all end up in stocks.
Molybdenum: Rhodium's great.
Rhodium: radium palladium! osmium radium platinum!
Iridium: RHODIUM'S NAME IS NOT RHODIUM!
Rhodium: What is it?
Iridium: SOUTH CALIFORNIUM!
Palladium: Oh, why did we build Samey's face?
Palladium was shown dancing to "We Built Gwen's Face," except they replace Gwen with Samey.
Cadmium: We built Samey's face!
Iridium: Oh, why did we build Samey's face?
Cesium: BE SERIOUS!
Molybdenum: How are you even dancing? You're in stocks!
Iridium: Oh, why did we build Samey's face?
Rhodium: this is a miracle!
Palladium: Oh, why did we build Samey's face?
Iridium: I wrote the lyrics down!
Lithium: They're way ahead, so we've got to go!
Vanadium: We've got to build something to sail, something we can row!
Iridium: It doesn't have to be a boat!
Lithium and Vanadium: As long as it stays afloat!
Lithium, Vanadium, and Iridium: Oh, why did we build Samey's face?
Helium and Potassium: It's almost ready, to set sail!
Potassium: Just hammering in the final nail!
Lithium, Vanadium, and Iridium: Oh, oh, oh!
Bismuth: We really did this fast!
Helium and Potassium: Soon we'll be back in first class!
Helium, Potassium, and Bismuth: Because they built Samey's face!
Lithium, Vanadium, and Iridium: We built Samey's face!
Helium, Potassium, and Bismuth: We're gonna take first place!
Lithium, Vanadium, and Iridium: Because we built Samey's face!
Lithium and Vanadium: We built Samey's face!
Palladium: that is good...
Iridium: i made myself the creepy stalker girl.
Palladium: The stalker girl's name is molybdenum, right?
Molybdenum: PALLADIUM!!!!
Palladium: oh no!
Iridium: i put it on the internet! hey! who's phone is that?
Palladium: Hydrogen's phone. I guess he left it here.
Iridium: oh! sorry, hydrogen! but the song is so awesome!
Palladium: Now let's play stuck to a pole!
Potassium: Rubidium's stuck to a pole!
Iridium: Give me a better one.
Potassium: She got stuck! Should have ducked! Worst of luck! Stuck, stuck to a pole!
Cesium: Rubidium's dead, can you realize?
Cadmium: indium's my wife?
Cesium: Now...
Cadmium: i am in stocks! help me out!
Actinium: Wait... Where's Thallium?
Palladium: thallium's? who is thallium's
Rhodium: thallium's? is that even a real element?
Actinium: I said Thallium. The one who has been really wise.
Rhodium: iridium's are not wise though!
Iridium: THEY SAID THALLIUM!
Rhodium: iridium's right. they're thulium's.
Iridium: You do realize you're drunk, right?
Rhodium: thallium's!?
Iridium: Oh, nothing.
Rhodium: iridium's dead? yes!
Iridium: I'M STILL ALIVE!
Suddenly, a voice cried help.
Rhodium: iridium's mother!?
Palladium: iridium's mother didn't need to sound like thulium.
Vanadium: Iridium's mother does NOT sound like Thallium.
Rhodium: IRIDIUM'S MOTHER IS HERE!
Nitrogen: SILVER cadmium iridium's tin antimony's!
Rhodium: thallium's..
Nitrogen: bismuth's in your tummy!
Vanadium: Okay...
Rhodium: vanadium's attacking us! run!
Rhodium: THALLIUM'S,
Palladium: LEADS,
Nitrogen: OXYGEN'S INTO YOUR TUMMY.
Palladium: POLONIUM RADON'S,
Rhodium: astatine's a snack to me!
Iridium: RHODIUM'S ACTING LIKE AN IDIOT, SO STOP SINGING ABOUT ASTATINE SNACKS.
Rhodium: francium's lasting a long time.
Palladium: iridium's without the first two is and second i replaced with an a,
Rhodium, Palladium, Magnesium, Cadmium, and Iridium: THEN, ACTINIUM'S AT 89!
Iridium: why haven't i realized i was drunk and acted like a sane person? why did i call myself I Radium?
Cadmium: thallium's not so wise after all, i guess.
Copper: Am I the only sane one around here?
Molybdenum: Niobium is sane too.
Rhodium: iridium's!
Iridium: platinum's god, mercury is a planet.
Cadmium: osmium's eaten!
Iridium: osmium's real!?
Palladium: iridium.
Rhodium: Rhode Island is not my place... iridium's land is!
Iridium: rhodium's finally correct!
Actinium: Hey guys, act sane again!
Iridium: platinum's edible!
Palladium: you do realize that's mercury, right?
Iridium: thallium's smart.
Palladium: oh my god, i found cerium!
Magnesium: manganese's attack...
Manganese: i am drunk too. my favorite drink is actinium's.
Copper: Okay, START ACTING SANE!
Location: First Floor Area
Copper: Thallium's in...
Copper lets out the scream for his life.
Iridium: i radium platinum gold!
Copper: THALLIUM!
Manganese saw Thallium's body shoved up in a vending machine.
Iridium: THALLIUM'S IN GRAVE DANGER...
Thallium: Guys? I'm stuffed in a vending machine... and I can't get out!
Manganese: magnesium's to the rescue!
Thallium: You're drunk. Please, I'm bleeding... This is the third vending machine related incident... Remember Aluminum and Neptunium's deaths? They all involved THIS vending machine.
Lead: Thallium! I'll save you!
Thallium: If I die... Let me out... I'm bleeding...
Lead: DON'T SUFFOCATE!
Lead pulls Thallium out.
Thallium: Thank you... Now that I'm bleeding... Can you please, help me?
Lead: Thallium, I can help you!
"I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!"
The wrecking ball had Mendeleev on it. It knocks everyone out... and injures Thallium TERRIBLY.
At 6:50 PM...
Rhodium: Thallium's dead? Well, at least I'm no longer drunk.
Iridium: Thallium is probably gone...
Rhodium: THALLIUM... NO!!!
Praseodymium: Thallium...
Thallium's (now) dead body was shown.
Rhodium: THALLIUM! THEY KILLED YOU!
Iridium: We've been knocked out for 12 hours. Thallium's gone...
Rhodium: IRIDIUM'S INDIUM.
Iridium: Indium's iridium, I guess...
Rhodium: Iridium's a shot, I thought.
Iridium: Rhodium's from Rhode Island!
Rhodium: PALLADIUM'S A PLATINUM RIP OFF.
Palladium: It's true. However, I'll avenge you, Platinum. Look into this picture... it might be Platinum's spirit.
Hafnium: It's platinum's spirit... and also 6:59.
Rhodium: Hafnium's alive as ever!
Hafnium: LANTHANUM'S!!!!!
Suddenly, Mendeleev comes again!
Mendeleev: I KILLED MENDELEVIUM... WHILE YOU WERE KNOCKED OUT! I also punched mendelevium's eyes for a long time.
Hafnium punches mendelevium's eyes.
HAFNIUM'S CAPABLE OF THE IMPOSSIBLE!
Hafnium: Hydrogen's nice...
Nitrogen: Whoa.
HAFNIUM'S GONNA PUNCH MENDELEVIUM'S EYES AGAIN!
Hafnium: HEY! I WON'T DO THAT!
Hafnium punches mendelevium's eyes. Meanwhile, Mendeleev had a chainsaw...and switched it to ON mode! Mendeleev planned to do something EVIL with it...
Hafnium: (screams)
Tungsten: Hafnium!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hafnium: T-TUNGSTEN, THERE'S A CHAINSAW IN MY SHOULDER!
Einsteinium: Hafnium's being chainsawed! I GOTTA SAVE HIM!
Hafnium: I MUST CONTINUE PUNCHING MENDELEVIUM'S EYES THOUGH!
Soon, Hafnium discovered...
Hafnium: My arm!
Hafnium's arm was cut off.
Hafnium: (screams)
Tungsten: Hafnium...
Hafnium: It's okay... I can punch mendelevium's eyes with one arm. My arm is amputated, but I can still be Hafnium!
Tungsten: You ruined Hafnium's beauty! Now...
Suddenly, a chainsaw went through Hafnium's body!
Hafnium: (screams the last scream of his lifetime)
Tungsten: Hafnium!!!!!
Hafnium: NO! DON'T! Oh, no...
Hafnium dies with the chainsaw in his body.
Mendeleev: Now, Mendelevium's also dead. Something tell him that...
Yttrium: Hafnium's gone...
Ytterbium: Hafnium, Tantalus Tungsten then we're on to. Rhenium, osmium indium's; platinum... NO! Hafnium!
Einsteinium: This injury is TOO severe to fix! Oh, Hafnium's finally gone...
Tungsten: Why was he even called Hafnium?
Ytterbium: He was half of a holmium's balloon, that's why.
Einsteinium: You mean a helium balloon!?
Tungsten: Hafnium's dead corpse... it's creepy... hafnium's finished... Hafnium...
Ytterbium: Now...
Palladium: Hafnium's neck healed, at least. Now that he is gone... let's bury him.
Palladium was shown burying Hafnium's grave in the cemetery later.
Location: Cemetery
Palladium: I hope I die next to you, Hafnium... Hafnium... hafnium...
Iridium: Will Hafnium come back?
Einsteinium: Hafnium's too injured... his heart was stabbed...
Iridium: Can you clone Hafnium?
Einsteinium: Unfortunately... I haven't gotten any hafnium samples
Tungsten: HAFNIUM'S GONE FOREVER!?
Einsteinium: Hafnium's fun to play with.
Later...
Location: First Floor Area
Ytterbium: Let's sleep now.
Copper: Nickel could be comforting to sleep with... he always wondered.
Iridium: My nose is intact again!
Einsteinium: Oh, yeah. When Sulfur broke your nose?
Iridium silvered Iridium himself, no fault!
Iridium: NO I DID NOT!
Iridium gives himself sleep medicine.
Cadmium: Iridium's probably gonna survive until the end! Go Iridium!
Iridium: (snores)
Cadmium: STOP SNORING!
Cadmium kicks Iridium.
Iridium: (snores)
Cadmium: Iridium, stop snoring.
Iridium: osmium's silver's!
Cadmium: Come on, Iridium; Iridium; Iridium; Iridium! Iridium, Iridium! Iridium!
Cadmium kicks Iridium.
Cadmium: Come on...
Iridium still sleeps.
Cadmium: Fine, you lazy guy...
Iridium: cadmium's good.
Cadmium: INDIUM'S, CATCH THIS!
Cadmium gives Iridium a punch in the stomach.
Iridium: C-CADMIUM!
Cadmium: Iridium's too lazy.
Iridium: cadmium's even meaner.
Thing-that-looks-like-osmium: iridium's looking hot today.
Iridium: WHAT!?
The thing that looked like osmium fell on Iridium's head.
Iridium: WHO DROPPED THIS PIECE OF...osmium...
Palladium: Iridium!!!
Iridium: osmium's! Osmium is really alive after all.
Iridium, OSMIUM'S DEAD. We JUST love using the word Osmium in context.
Iridium: Excuse me...
Iridium gets out some waking pills. One minute later...
Iridium: ARE EARTH METALS ARE ON SALE?
Palladium: ARE EARTH METALS?
Iridium: SHUT UP! Anyways, are earth metals are a parody of "Rare earth metals." It includes Podium, Hahnium, Geranium...
Palladium: Geranium? Don't you mean Germanium?
Iridium: SHUT UP. Are Earth Metals are REALLY rare. If you can hunt down people named "Palladium," you can find them!
Palladium: Iridium's truly evil.
Iridium: I'M ON CRACK, GUYS!
Palladium: Indium's either trying to...
Iridium: RARER earth metals. Such a wonderful thing. They are rarer than Palladium thinking about Iridium's death.
Palladium: Which is very rare?
Iridium: VERY COMMON.
Iridium punches Palladium's stomach.
Iridium: Excuse me, but I gotta stay up all night!
Palladium: To ensure that you won't die tonight... we'll all stay up.
Later... Everyone (except Palladium) was snoring.
Iridium: palladium's are fake...
Palladium: Iridium, everyone's snoring. (yawn)
Iridium: Where? Rhodium?
Rhodium: (snores)
Palladium: Iridium, stop dancing to... Dysprosium Helium Erbium!
Iridium: OSMIUM'S SINGING IN THIS SONG THOUGH!
Palladium: Dude, that's Odium, not Osmium.
Iridium: I won't sleep!
Iridium realizes it's now July.
Palladium: Iridium, seriously. Wake up, Rhode Island!
Iridium: Palladium's deleting my lines!
Iridium's angered at Palladium!
Iridium's |<[OSMIUM THE TERRIBLE]
Iridium: Osmium the terrible? Seriously? GOGGLE DOCUMENTS!? SERIOUSLY!?
Palladium: One, it's Google Documents, and two, I made up that name when I was a child.
Rhodium: (snores)
Iridium: Rhodium's snoring!
Palladium: STOP SNORING!
Palladium kicks Rhodium's stomach.
Rhodium: (screams)
Everyone wakes up.
Palladium: Remember that evil vending machine? Well, I gotta get a drink or two from there...
Rhodium: P-PALLADIUM, YOU...
Palladium gets out his money, and then requests some soda.
Rhodium: How does this soda taste?
Palladium: GROSS! Tastes like blood.
Rhodium: Who's blood?
Palladium: Neptunium! Tastes like Neptunium... wonder why they're called ALUMINUM'S cans, too.
Rhodium: Aluminum died in here?
Palladium: YES! He was STUFFED in there! He suffocated. Neptunium died because...
Uranium: NEPTUNIUM'S SINGING WAS HORRIFYING!?
Palladium: YES, UNFORTUNATELY! Vending machines hate singing so much...
Uranium: Oh, dang it...
Palladium: If I die, let me die next to Iridium.
Iridium: It's 5:03 AM, in the morning. Let's seriously take a nap...
Uranium: Iridium...
Iridium: THEN Actinium's at 89!
Uranium: Super-Lutetium's listening to you!
Iridium: Super Lutetium?
Uranium: I mean, Radioactive-Lutetium's listening to you!
Rhodium: Actually, you poisoned us with radioactivity. So did Einsteinium. I feel like I gotta...
Strontium: Rubidium's still dead. Also, Nitrogen's not that much use..
Carbon: Me neither. I wonder why they focused on Iridium's osmium-like dancing instead of my seriousness.
Nitrogen: Me neither.
Suddenly, Palladium couldn't take it anymore. Palladium grabs Iridium's arm.
Iridium: Palladium, I recommend that you let go of me.
Palladium throws Iridium.
Iridium: OUCH. At least I'm aware of the effects of ruthenium's now...
Nitrogen: It's 5:30 AM!
To be continued...
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